Lately I have been thinking about my online interactions, mainly my posts that show me out and about enjoying life. Well I am enjoying life, but there are two sides to every coin. My life is definitely not rainbows, unicorns and sunshine all day. Hear me out…
I enjoy sharing my life journey with whoever will listen. Positive affirmation from family and loved ones, friends and people who I have never met invigorates me. It is fuel to keep my fire burning, and that is one reason I share so openly. Another reason is to show others struggling with life that you can overcome your troubles, you just need a positive attitude and mental fortitude to solve problems with grace.
My world is a Rollercoaster each day, the highs are amazing and the lows are dark. I struggle to keep going sometimes because I know the lows are coming nonstop, and it sucks. Writing these thoughts leaves me so vulnerable, but admitting my vulnerability publicly strengthens me in an odd way.
I will be the first to say don’t worry so much, things will work out the way God intended them to. But I worry everyday about so many things that it is driving me crazy. Life is becoming so difficult, and many times I find myself thinking how in the hell can I keep going on like this. Then I think of my son, my parents and family, my loved ones and friends. I want to be alive, to help my son grow, to enjoy and participate in my family doings. To love and be kind, and hopefully leave a positive impact on every human I have encountered.
I think what I am trying to say is I enjoy sharing life with you all. It is definitely different than I imagined, and very difficult. But it’s still awesome.